Poly. Polyamory. Polyamorous. Mono. Monogamy. Non-monogamy. What do you think when you hear or read these words? People believe that we are meant to be secluded into one lifestyle. In reality, we are meant to be a part of multiple people’s lives and for different reasons (and there is nothing wrong with that). Poly: many. Polyamory: having multiple romantic and platonic (sometimes sexual) relations consensually. Polyamorous: to engage and practice the actions/lifestyle of multiple partners. Mono: One. Monogamy: practicing one romantic, emotional, and physical partner. Non-monogamy: not practicing the traditional “standards” of one single sexual, emotional, or affection from/towards one partner.
This topic has been circling around the internet and shaking the room: polygamy. Polygamy is where you have multiple partners; these partners ARE NOT only sexual partners, but friends and emotional/romantic partners. A lot of people believe that when it comes to poly relationships, they are based entirely on sex only when it really has to do with communication, bonds, and connections. There is a lot to learn and be knowledgeable about. There is not only one side (something that may be as simple can turn out to be just as complex).
We are young, adulting, and still finding ourselves if we haven’t already. One of those attributes of ourselves that we are still figuring out and can still be the elephant in the room is sex. Sex, sex, and more sex.
In our twenty-somethings, we are trying to find romantic partners, sexual partners, and of course platonic partners. But, what is a “good time”? It can range from anything as simple as grabbing a drink, dinner, a movie, building something together, sight-seeing, and even sex. A good time can be anything for the two people it’s meant for. Friendships are meant to be for you and your partner to be able to have personal and private relationships that are comfortable and respectful to their outside partners, each other, and themselves. There is no reason to fall victim to pushing your friends away because of a romantic partner and there is no reason to lose a good friend because there is sexual tension, if any.
Sexual tension is normal. It’s just the rising anticipation between you and your partner. Overall, this tension is a positive feeling but sometimes it can be negative (no need to talk about that though). Just know when the room is getting hot and you are feeling under your arms clammy, it might just be the temperatures rising between you two (wink, wink).
How do you feel about sex now? What about romance and platonic relationships? Have you spoken about these topics with your friends? They might just be interesting (or not), but it is a conversation starter, and it is something to be aware of even if it’s not accepted.